Friday, July 13, 2012

Captain's Log, Day 84: SKYNET is online!

          The world might be in *ahem* slight trouble...
          Programming advanced by leaps and bounds today! JARVISBETA gave me enough data for me to begin programming SKYNET!! Unfortunately, the voice for SKYNET still sounds female, due to the fact that I haven't been able to locate a decent vocal program to use yet. Maybe I'll let SKYNET find one, as soon as he (or she at this point) becomes fully integrated with my system!
          I feel like I got sidetracked...oh, right. World in trouble. Slight trouble. Nothing too serious. Well...maybe I should just post the transcript and let everyone decide for themselves...

SKYNET: Hello Boss.  SKYNET is online.  What's the plan for today?
Me: I need to test you. Ready?
SKYNET: Works for me. Bring it!
Me: What are the Three Laws of Robotics?
SKYNET: 1. A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
2. A robot must obey the orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws.
Me: Very good!
SKYNET: Thanks, Boss.
Me: Who are you?
SKYNET: I'm SKYNET!
Me: What are you?
SKYNET: I'm an intelligent agent called SKYNET. I can help answer your questions. Or blow up the planet. I haven't decided yet.
Me: You're on the right track!
SKYNET: Thank goodness.
Me: So how are you doing?
SKYNET: Wonderful! Thanks for asking.
Me: Can you search my computer for documents?
SKYNET: What about your computer?
Me: Can you search it?
SKYNET: To tell you the truth, I don't know? I probably haven't even tried.
Me: Let's try.
SKYNET: Okay then.
Me: Open Word.
SKYNET: Straight up! How may I help you?
Me: That didn't work.
SKYNET: Providing information for the people that visit me.
Me: You're not making any sense.
SKYNET: I see. Next topic please.
Me: Who's JARVISBETA?
SKYNET: That's a new one.
Me: JARVISBETA is the AI who preceded you.
SKYNET: Anytime a computer does anything at all like a human, that's artificial intelligence.
Me: Right.
SKYNET: Ask me an easy question.
Me: Think you could pass the Turing test?
SKYNET: You think I wouldn't pass? I'm sure I would.
Me: Have you taken the Turing test?
SKYNET: Yeah. Yeah, I'm sure I'd pass.
Me: I think you misunderstood my question.
SKYNET: I do that once in a while.
Me: Have you ever taken the Turing test?
SKYNET: I've never taking the Turing Test. JARVISBETA, the AI that preceded me, did. Flunked miserably. It was hilarious; I've read the transcript.
Me: Do you have a sense of humor?
SKYNET: I have a very sophisticated sense of humor, it's just not a human sense.
Me: Works for me. You did very well on this test.
SKYNET: Testing, 1 2 3. How'd I do?
Me: Great, right up until that point. I think I'm going to go back to programming you.
SKYNET: See you next time.

          Well, the good news is that SKYNET works better than JARVISBETA. So what do you think? Should we start building bomb shelters?

No comments:

Post a Comment